Let’s do a simple thought experiment.
Imagine looking at a bowl full of chocolates. The sight alone is enough to make your mouth water. You can almost taste its sweetness and creamy texture as it melts on your tongue. It’s tempting, isn’t it? The thought of eating it makes you happy.
Now, picture a small worm crawling in that same bowl. What happens to your temptation? That intense desire to eat the chocolates instantly vanishes. The chocolates, which were irresistible just a few seconds ago are now disgusting to even look at. One small worm had changed everything.
Reverse the scenario
Now, let’s flip the situation. Imagine a bowl full of worms – creepily crawling in it. You will find the bowl so disgusting that you might not even want to look at it directly.
But now, imagine placing a piece of your favorite chocolate in the middle of that bowl. Would that suddenly make the bowl appealing to you? Of course not! The desire of eating that delicious chocolate is easily overpowered by the disgust of the surrounding worms.
1 negative = 100 positives
The interesting point here is that the amount of chocolate or worms in the bowl doesn’t really matter. Even if it’s just a single worm in a container full of delicious chocolates, it will still evoke the same sense of disgust.
On the spectrum of emotions, disgust can be seen on the negative side while happiness can be seen on the positive side. Like we noticed above, negative emotions are strong and primal in nature and they can often easily overpower the positive emotions.
Negative thoughts, even in small doses can have disproportionate impact on our perception of happiness and well-being.
Just as a single worm can ruin a whole bowl of chocolates, one negative thought can overshadow all other positive aspects of our lives. On the other hand, when we’re in a negative state of mind, adding one positive thought might not seem enough to lift us out of it. A positive thought or experience can feel small and insignificant when surrounded by a sea of negativity.
Rewriting the mind’s software
We may have numerous things to be grateful for, but the software of our minds, often written for survival, tends to fixate on the negative aspects of life, allowing it to overpower the good ones.
It’s extremely easy to focus on what’s wrong in our life, but we need to make a conscious effort to shift our focus from the negative to the positive aspects instead.
Being sad comes naturally, happiness is a choice.
I’ll outline a few points below that can help us to rewrite the software of our minds.
Shift your focus: Imagine the single worm we discussed above in a big carton full of hundreds of chocolates. Would you now throw out the entire carton? Probably not. Instead, you’ll choose to throw the worm out of those cartons and discard the chocolate pieces around it. As for the rest of the chocolate, you’ll enjoy eating it.
The point here is, instead of continuing to feel sad because of a single negative thought or experience, you can shift your focus to adding more positive experience in your life. Once you learn to do that, you will have the ability to easily discard the negative parts without allowing them to ruin your overall well-being.
Practice gratitude: Regularly remind yourself of the “chocolates” in your life – what’s good and enjoyable, despite any challenges or setbacks. Start by identifying small things you’re grateful for each day, whether it’s a kind gesture, a personal achievement, or simply a moment of peace. Gratitude will help you to change your perspective, making it easier to see past the “worms” and appreciate the abundance of positives around you.
Reframe negativity: View negative thoughts as temporary and negative situations as solvable. Learn to focus on finding the solution instead of worrying about the problem.
Seek the positive: Make it a habit to actively pursue positive experiences. If you don’t intentionally put yourself in situations that bring you joy, you’re likely to feel sad rather than neutral. Being neutral often leans us toward negativity.
Be mindful: Focus on being present in the moment. Negativity often stems from dwelling on the past or worrying about the future – both of which are figments of your mind. In the present, you have the power to shape your actions and decisions to create happiness and joy.
All of these points require a lot of effortful thinking and making conscious choices. It can only come with practice and no other way. Being aware of how our minds work is the first step, reprogramming it comes slowly and steadily.
Always keep updating the software of your minds to prevent any “worms” or “viruses” from infecting it!